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Better Not Bitter

Responding God's Way to Life's Challenges

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timing

Calm Down and Wait…Father Still Knows Best

I’ve been going through a bunch of older posts and I’m sure this one here is so much more for me than many of you…but just in case…I’m re-posting with a few revisions…

I remember not long ago waking up to an inevitable mess…well scratch that…it was definitely avoidable. I just didn’t act quickly enough and there goes the rest.  One of my dogs got sick and though I heard her yelping to go out,  I kind of allowed my sleepiness aka laziness have its way instead….and the moment I realized what was going on, it was too late…YAK!

DOG-03-RK0488-01P

I know that’s not the most aesthetically pleasing picture, but imagine how I felt about the smell!

EEEW!!!  Out steps the dog and in steps ODOBAN….

Anyway, while Angel was whining,  I didn’t just lay silent in bed.  I’m a light sleeper so I actually responded, “Calm down, just wait!”  Yes, I treated her as if she were a human and as if she had the ability to do what I’d requested on cue…dog people should get that..

But for those of you who either have been misled into thinking that cats are an acceptable companion and not the irritating piece of furry vermin with claws they really are or that you’re perfectly okay with no four-legged critters around, I’ll explain further.

thDXHBZKIT

Needless to say, my request was fruitless…she’s a dog and while she obeys many commands and there are days when I just know she “gets me” more than any other human on the planet, she can’t be expected to follow my instruction in mid-yak!  I mean it’s involuntary and like us, when we get sick of something and have to purge, it’s a not so nice feeling that we aren’t exactly able to stomach either…pun intended….

doglaughing

Now that I’ve grossed you out so far…I guess I should find a point here..

Well, unlike my dog, when our Master tells us to calm down and wait, it’s in our best interest because not doing so is the only time there’s a mess to clean up. The kicker is that we do have a choice when we’re told to wait.  images (1)

Why?  Because God loves us so much He allows us to have free will. I mean the Guy spoke and there was night and day so of course He could’ve created of us to obey on demand, but that’s not how God rolls.

The problem is we rarely listen to His advice the first, second, or even third time.  I guilty here!

Yep, sometimes I have to learn my lesson over and over again.

There’s a definite benefit to not worrying, looking at a situation objectively, and listening to what God says before responding irrationally.

I’m learning day by day that while it seems things are taking forever to manifest, God will not leave me hanging for longer than I can bear. And since He knows best, I believe I’ll calm down and wait a while longer.

©2014-2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Be ready or Get Left Behind

I had to teach my daughter an important lesson about timing this morning. When you’re not ready, you get left behind!

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Now Kayla had been a hard sleeper since birth so I’m not surprised by her innate delays every morning…surprised no…annoyed YES!!!

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I used to consider it a blessing she slept so hard though…I could have her hair done and have her fully clothed before breakfast when she was younger. The problem is she’s no longer a toddler! She can dress herself!

Sincerely this has become a major pet peeve…yet, while in times passed I’ve warned and waited…today I just left.

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Today was the last straw…I even snatched the covers off before I decided my exit…
…and she had the nerve to mention what would Jesus do…my reply, Jesus would say get up!!! Take up your mat and walk!  Apparently she considered herself awake though she was still lazing in bed.

Long story short…I dropped my son off…she had an attitude when I got back, but now she was on my time and at my mercy.

You see she doesn’t have to be at school until an hour after her brother but I drop her off early so she can chat with her friends before school. It’s really a privilege for her and a covenience for me.

Eventually we left together after I got ready. I admit I delayed things on purpose. Lord, forgive me!

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Anyway…she reached her destination on time because of grace…she could have rode the school bus that’s always late…or she could have walked…or she could have missed out completely…and without saying a word further, she knew it could be worse….

So what’s the moral here?

When it’s time to go, don’t ignore the warning…get up and move or you will get left behind.

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I’ve had to learn this lesson too many times…and if yesterday’s post wasn’t evidence enough that I’d been getting ready for too long, my own frustration with my daughter’s passivity was just the match I needed to burn up my tendency to procrastinate! With that I advise you to get moving before you too get left behind.

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It’s “Do” Season

Oddly enough I’m just going to keep this short and sweet for myself and for anyone else out there who’s been too comfortable “in the meantime.”

Today as I walked my dogs I noticed a bumble bee, a butterfly, and several wasps flitting by.  I also took note of several summer flowers still in bloom.  It occurred to me that these bad boys had no idea  the season changed!  They were still holding on for dear life!

No pun intended….okay yes it was….images (9)

I laughed at one wasp because it was trying to fly against the wind.  It was going no where….which brings me to my point.  Just like the confused insects, until yesterday, I really   had no idea what season it was for me either.

This little message helped change my mind:
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Simply stated, It’s Time

I have made some strides by faith that have almost entirely blown my mind lately, but really I’ve moved slower than God’s been leading me.  It’s not that I don’t want the harvest…it’s that I’ve had this little issue with timing…I guess I hadn’t realize how quickly seasons change.

This is an accelerated one for me and possibly for you as well.  That said is there something that you know you should be doing that you are not simply because you want to “wait four more months?”

John 4:35 New Living Translation 

35 You know the saying, ‘Four months between planting and harvest.’ But I say, wake up and look around. The fields are already ripe[a] for harvest.

So while the bugs I mentioned earlier were still holding onto a season that had passed, I’m aware that my destiny is too important to try to fly against the changing winds.  So now I’m eagerly embracing my “do” season.

©2015 Nadia Davis.  All Rights Reserved.

Calm Down and Wait

I woke up to an inevitable mess this morning…well scratch that…it was definitely avoidable, I just didn’t act quickly enough and there goes the rest…one of my dogs got sick and though I heard her yelping this morning to go out.  I kind of allowed my sleepiness aka laziness have its way instead….and the moment I realized what was going on, it was too late…YAK!

DOG-03-RK0488-01P

I know that’s not the most aesthetically pleasing picture for a Sunday morning…but imagine how I felt about the smell!

EEEW!!!  Out steps the dog and in steps ODOBAN to the rescue….

Anyway, while Angel was whining,  I didn’t just lay silent in bed.  I’m a light sleeper so I actually responded, “Calm down, just wait!”  Yes, I treated her as if she were a human and as if she had the ability to do what I’d requested on cue…dog people should get that..

But for those of you who either have been misled into thinking that cats are an acceptable companion and not the irritating piece of furry vermin with claws they really are or that you’re perfectly okay with no four-legged critters around, I’ll explain further.

thDXHBZKIT

Needless to say, my request was fruitless…she’s a dog and while she obeys many commands and there are days when I just know she “gets me” more than any other human on the planet, she can’t be expected to follow my instruction in mid-yak!  I mean it’s involuntary and like us, when we get sick of something and have to purge, it’s a not so nice feeling that we aren’t exactly able to stomach either…pun intended….

doglaughing

Now that I’ve grossed you out so far…I guess I should find a point here..

Well, unlike my dog, when our Master tells us to calm down and wait, it’s in our best interest because not doing so is the only time there’s a mess to clean up. The kicker is that we do have a choice when we’re told to wait.

Why?  Because God loves us so much He allows us to have free will. I mean the Guy spoke and there was night and day so of course He could’ve created of us to obey on demand, but that’s not how God rolls.

The problem is we rarely listen to His advice the first, second, or even third time.  I guilty here!

Yep, sometimes I have to learn my lesson over and over again before I get it.

Like the little lesson I learned over the past few days, there’s a definite benefit to stop worrying, look at the situation objectively, and listening to what God says about it before you respond. In fact, just last weekend while on a road trip, I found myself giving another young lady the same advice…go figure….rather, I told her that waiting is her best option when she mentioned, ” I mean I want to be married like yesterday!”

It’s not the first time I’d heard her say that and given my own history, I couldn’t dare allow her to make the same mistakes I had because of impatience.  Also, after talking some more with her and another friend, we all realized the one thing we had in common.  We were all sort of angry with our men…well, one girl seemed to be chronically upset with hers, but that’s a subject for another day.  I guess the situation wasn’t as funny as our laughter made it seem at the time, but as we vented we realized our abrupt actions led to a trivial pursuit of having it our way. Of course, the guys on the road trip gave us a hand in that revelation.

Nonetheless, perhaps our little battle of the sexes proved one thing.  We all essentially want the same thing in a committed relationship: to be loved unconditionally, respected, and appreciated; but men and women are different and it takes time for those differences to either compliment or repel one another.  Also it definitely helps if you know what makes you feel loved. Check out 5 love languages for singles…Awesome read!!!

Given that understanding, it’s important to know that marriage doesn’t start with the wedding.  It starts with God.  Unfortunately, however, we live in a microwave culture and because so many don’t take the time to wait on God’s approval, provision, and timing, far too many marriages end with the wedding.

Even still, unlike my lazy response to my dog’s cries for help, God understands our fragile ability to wait and He gives us grace to calm down and wait if we just listen.  Over time I’ve learned He also won’t leave me hanging like I left my poor Angel a little too long this morning.  For that, I’m grateful.

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Stop, Look, and Listen…Then Respond

James 1:19 The Message (MSG)

Act on What You Hear

19-21 Post this at all the intersections, dear friends: Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear. God’s righteousness doesn’t grow from human anger. So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life.

  You need to do what you are supposed to do and then you will be able to do what you want to do.

I’ve said that to my son and daughter countless times over the last few months, but this morning I finally decided to listen to my own advice.

I’ve been struggling with a relationship concern so I asked God to help me with it. I reminded Him that I prayed for my Joseph and that I was thankful that He delivered, but I couldn’t understand what was up with me all of a sudden.

It’s like I was in super passive mode.  I wanted to keep it real with him, but the that was where I was running into trouble.

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God reminded me that before He brought him into my life and several times since then that He’d told me pretty much the same thing I’d told my children.

Now because I knew my response to my children was the result of them not completing a chore assigned them, I knew what I needed to do that I hadn’t.

I’m relieved God is my Father!  I know He has my best interest in mind and that my opportunity for a loving relationship wasn’t removed, but delayed in a sense by my own hand.  I had a mess to clean up first.

I was told to take things slow.  God knew I needed to get my heart ready.  The pain from my past bred some issues and attitudes that needed to die.  Low self-worth and ungodly soul-ties had to go!

I thought I had it together…

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In theory I believed I was okay with God’s timing, taking things slow, but lately certain tests have proven that I’m not nearly as ready as I need to be.

The problem…

You know those pesky little issues I mentioned earlier that I needed to kill?  Well, perhaps I didn’t exactly put an end to ‘em after all.

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Sure, I let most of the lies that led me to settle for less get sick, but fear of releasing the familiar later had me hooking ‘em up to life support apparently.  Well, today I had a wake- up call…okay, I actually got a few days ago and I’m playing catch up, but you get my point I’m sure.

The issue that cropped up between my beau and I really should not have been an issue at all.  But it became one because of my response to his honesty.  He ultimately had honored what I requested from the very beginning…that he be up front and completely honest.  Yet, I responded to him from an insecure place.

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Well, after some time alone with the Lord and His word, I realized I was the only one in my way.  In effect, by not killing those issues of my past, I prevented myself from being able to slow down in my heart.  I created the delay.

In retrospect, had I done so, I would have been able to consider the proper response.  I would have realized how rash my comments otherwise would have been. But I didn’t stop myself, look at the situation has a whole, or listen to what God had already placed on my heart.

In reality I responded the way I did because I hadn’t fully killed the issues of my past.  Sure I am divorced, but I involuntarily reacted in a way as if I had been dealing with my ex…you know someone I couldn’t trust….someone who had lied everyday of our marriage…someone who disrespected me just because I allowed it.  None of which had been the case with My Joseph…not when we were just friends…not when we decided to step further…

Apparently, I grew accustomed to my affliction.  I was so used to hiding my real feelings that I almost short-circuited my ability to be loved unconditionally. That’s a sacrifice I’m not willing to make again.

So now I’m determined to pull the plug on the pain of my past and embrace my future with confidence.  That said, I’m quite okay with pumping my brakes until God gives me the green light to accelerate from now on.

©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

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