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Better Not Bitter

Responding God's Way to Life's Challenges

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marriage

Who this Lady Wants!

Funny it’s probably been two months since I wrote most of this, but today God’s given me permission to post it.

I was tickled last week when my pastor mentioned an upcoming relationship series entitled “what a woman wants/what a man needs.” I thought, SPOILER ALERT!  It won’t be the first time my posts and private devotion have matched the sermon message so I’m on the right track or at the very least great minds think alike.  Anyway, I suppose some insecurities had to die in me first so here goes.

So the question was posted on social media recently:

The question of the Day:

What are single women of God looking for in a husband?  Yes I know a man who finds a wife finds a good thing, but women, what type man are you praying finds you? Define some characteristics of a good Godly man.  Let the conversation begin. I’d love to hear your opinions.

And so began my synopsis…

In all seriousness…it got me to thinking about who I really want as a husband…so I penned…

A while back when I was asked this question, I answered, “I want a man who loves God more than he could ever love me,” but over the years God showed me that while on the surface my request seemed humble and even sincere, it was a shell of what my heart truly desired.

So God had to get with me…to show me I wasn’t being real…that my request was made out of an extreme place.

Since my ex-husband and I were spiritually unequally yoked  I figured I was taking the best approach with my request, but then I began working at a marriage ministry. Who knew you could be unequally yoked with another Christian? While there I found myself witnessing countless malnourished ministerial marriages. Husbands had forgotten God said for them to love their wives. I mean Christ already died for the church, yet first ladies had become permanent figures on a pedestal instead of the relational and fun-loving women God designed them to be. There was no balance!

Yet, the reality I loathed was closer to home than I cared to admit even before I married my now ex-husband. I hated the dead air between the union of my former in-laws. How I despise fakeness! A married couple should never sleep in separate bedrooms.  I still remember leaning on the hallway wall in shock over this man-made marital mess! But somewhere down the line, codependent tendencies lured me into the mindset so many reading this feel, “well at least we’re still together!”

Seriously? For real? This thinking goes well beyond just wanting to be happy! At its core, it’s a surrendering of one’s willingness to be Healthy…so for a long while, I decided I did it wrong twice so why bother getting to know another disappointment?

Wow…pretty negative, huh? Exactly! Absolutely! Bitterness is what led that thought and what caged my heart from even God’s delicate touch for so long.

Yes, I even kept God at arm’s length because I refused to admit that yes, I desired the type of marriage God intended.

Sure, I haven’t been bitter with men for a long while, but until now I hadn’t had the courage to admit what this girl wants…yes who I want in a husband!

I want to marry my best friend. I want to have things in common with him only he and I know about one another. I want to be able to go out dressed to the nines or dressed down and never feel like I can’t be myself with him. I want to be spoiled with affection. Quality time has always been my preference above quantity.  Let’s face it sometimes I don’t want to be bothered either. I want a man who will appreciate my assets and minister to me in the areas where I perceive I lack. I want him to understand that though I’m tough, my truest form is delicate. I want him to take the time to listen. I don’t expect him to understand. I know our brains are wired differently, but I want him to make the effort. I want him to do spontaneous and romantic little things just because he cherishes my presence. I want him to love my children as his own. When I walk into a room full of people, I want him to look at me like I’m the only one in the room. I want him to be vulnerable enough to not just cry in front of me, but for his heart to feel so safe joined with mine that he is comfortable to even allow those tears to flow in my lap if need be.  I want a husband who not only knows me but who knows that the only way he truly does so is with Our Heavenly Father’s permission-that access to my heart is only granted because of his own growing relationship with Christ. He must be willing to grow with me spiritually, emotionally, and exponentially. I want my husband to be humble enough to pray, wait, and listen to God’s response in how he can love me best…in every way…to pray for me to receive all he has to offer…to pray with me daily…to never be ashamed of my testimony or threatened by my gifts or accomplishments. I want to admire my husband’s brilliant mind, but laugh myself silly with him just because. I want someone who protects me and who trusts his judgment of me if his family disagrees with his choice to marry me. I want my husband to understand the importance of family time as a priority.  I want him to understand that our time together alone is a priority even above the children. I really suppressed myself in my former marriage and I don’t ever want to feel as if I need to resort to that again. I want to my suitable complement.  I want someone who isn’t afraid to challenge me in love or be challenged by me in the same way. I want someone who’s been through something, but not still broken from past failures. I want someone who is vulnerable enough to admit they have fallen before, yet humble enough to understand God is who helped him get back up. I don’t want someone afraid to be themselves because I can smell a counterfeit. I always have.  I was just too broken before so I settled. I don’t want a man who is money hungry.  I can’t stand arrogance. I like nice things and I appreciate a man who works to get those things, but those things shouldn’t have him because those things don’t move me.

Man, take me for ice cream to laugh and listen…I’m good. The little things matter.

God’s let me know my future husband desires children of his own. I desire more children as well so that’s no problem. However, I don’t want to go it alone. I want him to be there for the doctor’s appointments and the delivery.  I want him with me when picking the furniture for the nursery. I want him to want to be there and not to just feel obligated. I want to know he means what he says. He must be honest. Even brutal honesty is better than a lie. I’ve said before I don’t want to date any man but my husband so my desire is to be courted. Old school for real…ask your Father permission…treats me like the lady I am all the time…kind of courtship…

Yeah…that is a lot, but I know God has him reserved for me because He wouldn’t have allowed me to finally express who this lady wants otherwise. I know God is able and since He gave me permission to request it, I know He’ll connect me in time with who He’s chosen to be by my side as my husband. Until then, I’m loving doing me because while God’s permitted me to desire what I want in my husband, I’ve finally submitted to His teaching on becoming the wife that he needs as well.

©2017 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Fix that Door and Move On!

Laughter is my best medicine. I must find the funny in everything to function and no, I’m not mental!

So…basically, I planned to go to bowling the other day…was dressed and for a change would have actually been on time (the Lord is yet working on me in this area)

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Anyway…I go to open the door to leave and there I am all dolled up (yep, I’m a bit girlie girl)…purse and keys in one hand, the door knob in the other…considering my options…

So I decided to break out my tools…yes and I know how to use them.SwaggerGirl_Cape

So finally I get to the point of my title…I couldn’t leave until I fixed the door…

It made me consider my current relational status…I don’t consider being single who I am…which was further confirmed by Sunday’s message…I know my purpose as a follower of Christ and I still consider myself a wife…I just know I’m meant to be one to the right one.

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I just happen to be in “transition”…yeah…that has a nice little ring to it.

You see…though I was heading bowling that night, I was still trying to wrap my head around what was to transpire the next day.

My ex-husband had planned to visit my daughter from Little Rock, and because I’m not allowing my daughter out of my sight for any reason, I had to go as well…

It wasn’t unforgiveness, but definitely uneasiness…

I had been sort of dreading the reunion because I didn’t want what usually happened to happen again… there were always “misunderstandings!”

I thought…I want him to know that I have no hard feelings, but I also don’t want him to think I have “other feelings” either.

See my dilemma?

It was always a catch 22…if I rejected speaking to him, I was thought to hate him…if I was nice…I was expected to remarry him…

I had been praying about our interaction all week and asking God to reveal to me if I had any unforgiveness lurking in my heart that went unchecked…God confirmed that I had forgiven him, however, that I needed to still endure this test.

 

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Well, prayer works…the Lord showed me that just as I’d left alcoholism alone nearly 8 years ago and since had several tests…and yes…though I’ve drank a little…like 3 times within that time…He showed me how I have no taste for that life or the liquor itself anymore…in essence, I had to be exposed to it to know I’m completely done…

Hey, I’m not knocking anyone who drinks, I just know my boundaries now…that’s something I never really had before…for drinking or relationships…

Just pass me a Green Tea and the one God has chosen for me!

I guess you really know that you have forgiven and closed the door to the hurt of your past when you find yourself praying for that person and not in one of those, “God get ’em prayers!”

My point in all this is that God showed me that I had to fix the broken places in this past relationship to properly close the door before I would truly have my heart free enough to receive the man God has for me.  I did what I needed to do.  Maybe it’s time you do the same.

 

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My Father’s Letter

Excerpted from my upcoming memoir…
I remember when God first bid me to meditate on Corinthians 7:10. It was after the inevitable. Following what had become our norm, I’d chosen my way out.

HERE WE GO AGAIN

This time the verbal assault ensued on a Friday, but the pain of my husband’s perpetual disregard of our vows had burrowed a hole in my heart long before that instance. At its onset, his accusations and obscenities barely pierced the void between us; the aftermath was always his exit. Yet, his departures became a welcomed solace. But this night, my fury held its grip.
I was numb. The thought of forgiving him, of praying for him again was not an option.
Disgusted, all I’d resolved in my heart surfaced. “I don’t have to take this mess! I’ll just get a divorce!” With that, I locked the door to my home and my heart.
I closed my eyes in hopes of a peaceful slumber unwilling to yield my decision only to be haunted by the stark reality of a verse I hadn’t recalled, but avoided all the same.
Steeped in bitterness, my attempt futile. The next morning I lie in bed with that verse invading my ego. He literally spelled it out in my mind’s eye. Against a canvas of complete darkness, He penned:
CORINTHIANS 7:10
The bold white letters embedded themselves in my consciousness after a brief but poignant introduction in what should have been a sweet self-serving dream.
It wasn’t the first time I’d been led to the word. Yet this time, I almost refused to cooperate. Still livid with my husband’s abrupt departure, I had no intention of being the obedient wife another day.
KICKING AND SCREAMING
After wrestling with the cumbersome task of staying in bed with my eyes wide shut most of the night, I relented, grabbed my bible, and opened to I Corinthians 7:10 revealing exactly what I didn’t want to see:
To the married I give this command (not I but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. (NIV)
Naturally, I was not too pleased. All I could think about were the lies he told, how many times he cursed me out in front of my children, and how many other ways he showed me just how much he didn’t love me. I was sleeping with the enemy and I felt like God should’ve cut me some slack. Immediately, I was more angry. This time God was on my hit list.
Oh I know that’s not exactly the response one would expect from a God-fearing woman, but I was pissed and I refused to be the only one to blame!
Yet a quick stint with reality had me more upset with myself. After all hadn’t I been the one who ignored all the signs before I said, ‘I do’? Had I ever had peace about our union period? Hadn’t I told myself to walk-away when we first met? Hadn’t I been too weak to stand with God alone?
Shuddering over the union I created, my anger hissed a certainty I could only wish were so easily removed as mistakes had been on my etch-a-sketch as a child. In that moment I longed even for that time again. At least then I knew how to erase what didn’t fit my portrait.
Yet, I’d chosen to use oil to seal this canvas now. The ink had long since dried.
BROKEN
In mid-rant, I remembered the second book. Ha! Maybe God meant 2 Corinthians 7:10?
I thought, “God loves me and He sees the pain I’m facing. Of course, He’ll give me a get out of jail free card.”
Yes, God did see my sorrow. He saw the mountains of my frustration and the valleys of my despair. He’d witnessed my tears and felt my shame. His response to my disobedience was simple.
As my eyes rested on the new passage, they met answers to questions I hadn’t the nerve to ask.
Godly sorrow brings about repentance that leads to no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.”
TEARS
Tears magnified the content as the flames of my ire were extinguished. And through wafts of smoke, I felt my Father’s embrace nudging me to continue.
With these words, “ See what this Godly sorrow has produced in you, what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done. At every point you have proved yourselves to be innocent in this matter. So even though I wrote to you, it was not on account of the one who did wrong or of the injured party, but rather that before God you could see for yourselves how devoted to us you are. By all this we are encouraged,” He loved me.
MORE TEARS
That day I realized my need to surrender. That by doing so I made the choice to love those who persecuted me, to pray for those who despitefully misused me; to feed my enemy when he is hungry.
RENEWED MIND
Later that day I took my son aside in the kitchen. “From now on you’ll see mama doing things differently. I’m not arguing with James* anymore. We will continue to pray for him though.” Recco was nine at the time.

This was the first step of many that would lead to my wholeness.
*name changed

Why am I still posting about Marriage? Man, I don’t know!

Trust this obedience to the Holy Spirit has me a bit spooked myself, but I’m going with it….

Yes, while I was perusing some of my old posts I came across this same little issue and felt the need to further discuss it….again…

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Okay I mentioned this the other day and the day before that and apparently last year, but anyway…here’s what I’ve come up with so far…

On a road trip last year, I found myself giving another young lady some advice about her relationship…go figure….rather, I told her waiting is her best option when she mentioned,

“I mean I want to be married like yesterday!”  

It’s not the first time I’d heard her say that and given my own history, I couldn’t dare allow her to make the same mistakes I had because of impatience.  Also, after talking some more with her and another friend, we all realized the one thing we had in common.  We were all sort of angry with our men at the time…well, one girl seemed to be chronically upset with hers, but that’s a subject for another day.  I guess the situation wasn’t as funny as our laughter made it seem at the time, but as we vented we realized our abrupt actions led to a trivial pursuit of having it our way. Of course, the guys on the road trip gave us a hand in that revelation.images

Nonetheless, perhaps our little battle of the sexes proved something fruitful…

Oh did I mention that this was a Single’s Trip meant for good, clean, fellowship and not hook-ups…I just thought I’d throw that in noting the irony of the motives behind some who join Single Ministries…

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I digress as usual…

Anyway, we all (guys and gals) seemed to want the same thing in a committed relationship: to be loved unconditionally, respected, and appreciated; but men and women are different and it takes time for those differences to either compliment or repel one another.  Also it definitely helps if you know what makes you feel loved. Check out 5 love languages for singles…Awesome read!!!

Given that understanding, it’s important to know that marriage doesn’t start with the wedding.  It starts with God.  Unfortunately, however, we live in a microwave culture and because so many don’t take the time to wait on God’s approval, provision, and timing, far too many marriages end shortly after the honeymoon.

So again…what can be done to get us on the right track to having the love that we feel we deserve….well for starters it could help that you are lovable.

I know that seemed a bit mean, but hear me out.

Are you treating people like you really want to be treated or are you going through life faking the funk occasionally and biting people’s heads off the rest of the time.

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The bible says, to have friends you must show yourself friendly…wouldn’t it stand to support that to have love you need to ensure that you’re lovable..

Now, I have had a past that I can’t really repeat right now…well because of copyright stuff but we’ve all got one…good, bad, ugly…some we wish we could completely eliminate from the planet…and then again some of you really would just prefer that  some of the guys and gals of your pasts would just disappear from the planet instead…

Whatever the case…the only way to get beyond the pain of yesterday is to face it and bury it…not burying it in a shallow grave…completely obliterating it the way we wish we could do that person who broke our hearts…that kind of annihilation…otherwise, those good guys and girls who are willing to stick it out with become a casualty of the war in your heart…some end up wounded and others end up dead…

Yes, you’ve successfully but not so much created another heartbroken zombie like yourself because you refuse to seek or accept the healing and help you need to be whole so you won’t be a ticking time bomb to others.

I know this post is all over the place, but I feel the need to spread the word about the importance of being whole yourself before you even think of tagging along with another person in your journey.

I don’t know why, but God does and that’s enough for today.

©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Don’t Rush the Process

 

Last year a friend made this comment about her relationship at the time,

“I mean I want to be married like yesterday!”  

Apparently, her biological clock was ticking louder than she cared to hear…images (1)

I mean really?  We’ve all seen some aspect of a “Bridezilla” whether on the reality show or in reality period so I’m just curious…

Question:  Are you on a mission to be married too?

I’ve had to even sit down and have a pow-wow with myself on this one.

 

Marriage is a big step…one I’ve been there, done it wrong twice…Do I even want to go there again?

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Having worked at a marriage ministry for a couple of years, I picked up a few pointers. Considering all the wedding announcements posted on social media and just as many if not more divorce filings plastered in the papers on a daily basis, I think it’s fair that I post a little info on the matter as well…

A bit of background…

I can’t tell you the number of calls I received from wives calling to purchase a certain book about “manhood” as a gift for their husbands.  Some even called under the guise that their husbands asked them to order it for them.  Yeah Right! Now some might have been legit, but it was something about the desperation in these women’s voices that clued me in otherwise.

Wow…and yes, I admit there were times when I told them point blank,

“You might not want to do that.”

These wives really wanted to figure out how they could “make” their husbands be the men they knew they could be.  While I felt their plight, I also understood one thing then that I’m actually finding issues with grasping today.

“You can’t really change a man.”

Moreover, you really should try to do it either.

Yep, and for the guys…

“You really can’t change a woman either.”

Yeah, I had just as many men were calling requesting certain materials for their to get some “act right” as it were!

DISCLAIMER: Gentlemen, if you are dealing with a fiercely domineering woman, the last thing you want to do is to give her that book as a “token of your appreciation.”

It won’t be appreciated.  In fact, it will likely be the start of a serious verbal assault. Sad but true. Don’t say I didn’t warn you…

 


For those single and seeking

Pray that God makes you ready to receive the love you need.

I know that seems simple, but I’ve had to learn I hadn’t been ready to receive the righteous love God wanted me to have in a marital relationship in the past because I had been unwilling to truly accept God’s love for me first.  I also want to point out that I said the love you need and not what you want….there is a difference…

Single Ladies and Gents,

The love you need is not going to be from someone to placate you by acquiescing to your every whim.  Rather, the love you need will bring out the best in you by any means necessary.  Yes, that includes letting you know occasionally that your stuff stinks too…

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With Love of course…

Regardless, examine your motives for marriage….it’s ministry!!!

Yep, both good marriages and bad marriages have the potential to spread a message.  I know it seems counterproductive to say that, but what I mean is people are always watching.  If you have children,  you have a captive audience so that’s something to think about, isn’t it?

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That said, if you’re not married yet, take a good hard look at your relationship and consider whether you put that “thang” together yourself or if it was the Lord’s doing!

Yes, I meant to say “thang” and yes I can get country…Memphis is rubbing off on me again…next thing you know I’ll be using words like “junt.”

…moving on

Though I’m technically single, I’ve learned to be wholly connected to something greater in this process. So no matter how loud my clock ticks, I’m no longer willing to rush who God’s approved as my covenant partner for anyone…not even for myself.

©2015-2017 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

 

Lord, Help me with me!!!!

Yesterday I witnessed male castration in a Kroger parking lot!

So today, I feel the need to discuss a woman’s need for submission!

Particularly, I’m speaking about marriage here, but if you’re not married there is still a level of submission necessary for things to flow in  your best interest.

I’m fully aware that the word submission alone sparks fear, anger, and even possibly disgust in the hearts of some women.  However, I’ve been on the wrong side of this coin before–You know, the neck jerking, “No man is going to ever tell me what to do!” and the Quiet as a church mouse, “Yes, dear…you’re so right dear” smug approach ….

Neither of which is true Godly submission.

For one thing, it’s plain disrespectful.  Ouch…I stepped on my own toes here ladies…however, when I mentioned the castration stuff…of course I don’t mean literally, but the look on the gentleman’s face could have equated to the same pain I imagine.

Basically, I witnessed a woman and her man have a bit of a disagreement.  Well, I guess I really can’t say a disagreement because usually that would mean that at least two people were involved right?

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I’m not being a butt…it’s just that the guy didn’t really say two words to the countless condescending remarks his lady spat in a matter of minutes.

I really felt sorry for the guy!!!

Now, I wasn’t going to even go here originally because I know just how touchy a subject submission is in and out of the church, but considering that I’ve written about homosexuality and the church I think I’ll live…

I don’t know if they were married.  Regardless, the scenario opened my eyes and gave me another reason to close my mouth.

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Basically,  he was attempting to open her car door and I suppose the way he positioned their basket made it slide in front of the door before he had a chance to stop it, and she just went left!  To me it was an obvious mistake, but it didn’t seem to matter to her.  She went on talking to him like he was a toddler.

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It was not like he’d done it on purpose nor did it appear that he was not going to try to stop it, but upon noticing my stance one car over, the look of “what’s the use” took over his entire countenance.

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And she didn’t stop there…she was so whiny and loud…all I could think was,

“Lord help me with me!”  

“Do I ever sound like that?”

I knew that on more than one occasion I had done that or something similar in years passed…months passed…okay maybe even in weeks passed…OTH_Header

…shssh….I had no idea the impact I’d made on those on the receiving end of my wrath….woe…but God’s shown me slowly a better approach…..I’m sure I’m not the only one thankful for that  lesson now…

Proverbs 3:6 (NIV)

in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.[a]

Listen, ladies…I’m not bashing the young lady.  I just observed what I did and it disturbed me.  It allowed me to see an ugliness that I needed to completely rid myself of if I ever expected to receive and appreciate the love God has for me in my future husband…Yep, I’m optimistic!

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Anyway, I’ll leave you with a note of truth mentioned Sunday by  a certain young pastor“You are not his mama and you are not his boss!”

 

Oh yeah, ladies…one more thing…we ladies can all tend to talk too much…the fact is that you can talk a good man in or out of your life…

I know that there are some independent sisters out there who could care less….I get it…I used to be one of you…that’s fine…you do you and I’ll do me…Image result for too independent to be in a relationship

Yet, the independent attitude gets old…God made us relational so contrary to the “invisible mantra” you may have adopted that says you need no one, we all need somebody other than ourselves to live fulfilled lives.

That said,  ladies, I think we could do ourselves a favor by keeping tabs on our tongue…at least in public!

© Nadia Davis 2015.  All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

Removed for Restoration

I remember a few years ago someone posted the following on Facebook,

“In life there are two certainties: You’ll never get everything you want and you’ll never want everything you get.”

Pretty Depressing Huh?  drowning

Of course I commented at the time and today I feel the need to elaborate.

In a nutshell then, I explained that when we view everything we receive and do not receive from a Kingdom perspective, we learn to appreciate those things we get and learn to also be grateful for not receiving the things we thought we wanted. Continue reading “Removed for Restoration”

Calm Down and Wait

I woke up to an inevitable mess this morning…well scratch that…it was definitely avoidable, I just didn’t act quickly enough and there goes the rest…one of my dogs got sick and though I heard her yelping this morning to go out.  I kind of allowed my sleepiness aka laziness have its way instead….and the moment I realized what was going on, it was too late…YAK!

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I know that’s not the most aesthetically pleasing picture for a Sunday morning…but imagine how I felt about the smell!

EEEW!!!  Out steps the dog and in steps ODOBAN to the rescue….

Anyway, while Angel was whining,  I didn’t just lay silent in bed.  I’m a light sleeper so I actually responded, “Calm down, just wait!”  Yes, I treated her as if she were a human and as if she had the ability to do what I’d requested on cue…dog people should get that..

But for those of you who either have been misled into thinking that cats are an acceptable companion and not the irritating piece of furry vermin with claws they really are or that you’re perfectly okay with no four-legged critters around, I’ll explain further.

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Needless to say, my request was fruitless…she’s a dog and while she obeys many commands and there are days when I just know she “gets me” more than any other human on the planet, she can’t be expected to follow my instruction in mid-yak!  I mean it’s involuntary and like us, when we get sick of something and have to purge, it’s a not so nice feeling that we aren’t exactly able to stomach either…pun intended….

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Now that I’ve grossed you out so far…I guess I should find a point here..

Well, unlike my dog, when our Master tells us to calm down and wait, it’s in our best interest because not doing so is the only time there’s a mess to clean up. The kicker is that we do have a choice when we’re told to wait.

Why?  Because God loves us so much He allows us to have free will. I mean the Guy spoke and there was night and day so of course He could’ve created of us to obey on demand, but that’s not how God rolls.

The problem is we rarely listen to His advice the first, second, or even third time.  I guilty here!

Yep, sometimes I have to learn my lesson over and over again before I get it.

Like the little lesson I learned over the past few days, there’s a definite benefit to stop worrying, look at the situation objectively, and listening to what God says about it before you respond. In fact, just last weekend while on a road trip, I found myself giving another young lady the same advice…go figure….rather, I told her that waiting is her best option when she mentioned, ” I mean I want to be married like yesterday!”

It’s not the first time I’d heard her say that and given my own history, I couldn’t dare allow her to make the same mistakes I had because of impatience.  Also, after talking some more with her and another friend, we all realized the one thing we had in common.  We were all sort of angry with our men…well, one girl seemed to be chronically upset with hers, but that’s a subject for another day.  I guess the situation wasn’t as funny as our laughter made it seem at the time, but as we vented we realized our abrupt actions led to a trivial pursuit of having it our way. Of course, the guys on the road trip gave us a hand in that revelation.

Nonetheless, perhaps our little battle of the sexes proved one thing.  We all essentially want the same thing in a committed relationship: to be loved unconditionally, respected, and appreciated; but men and women are different and it takes time for those differences to either compliment or repel one another.  Also it definitely helps if you know what makes you feel loved. Check out 5 love languages for singles…Awesome read!!!

Given that understanding, it’s important to know that marriage doesn’t start with the wedding.  It starts with God.  Unfortunately, however, we live in a microwave culture and because so many don’t take the time to wait on God’s approval, provision, and timing, far too many marriages end with the wedding.

Even still, unlike my lazy response to my dog’s cries for help, God understands our fragile ability to wait and He gives us grace to calm down and wait if we just listen.  Over time I’ve learned He also won’t leave me hanging like I left my poor Angel a little too long this morning.  For that, I’m grateful.

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