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Better Not Bitter

Responding God's Way to Life's Challenges

Month

April 2016

AIM Your Greatness

Great people can’t be idle! It’s not like greatness can be switched off! Yet, don’t we try sometimes?  I know I have.  Or maybe I just thought I had. However, when you’re destined for greatness, even in our foolishness we do the most! That’s why we must aim at the right target.

When I was going to clubs, drinking every night, and being promiscuous, I did that very well!!!

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So yes,  I even did some foolish things with greatness and didn’t even know it then.

I know now that I am destined for greatness, but if you’re a child of God, so are you!

Imagine your impact!!!  When we put God first, the same passion that seems to have us on a downward spiral can be redirected to do what we were purposed to do. We can’t help but be great because the Master Potter designed us that way!

It doesn’t matter what happened in our past….and yes that includes just yesterday too.  It’s never too late to turn around and get back on track.

When you’re idle it doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re doing nothing, but being idle ultimately produces nothing but wasted energy! Think about an idling car. The car is running, but not going anywhere.

Are you running in place too?

Are you making excuses because you feel like you can? On the road to destiny, it’s the ONLY thing you can’t do!

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Excuses are monuments to nothing! So what are you building? Are you building a wall to block people from seeing the real you?

How about a box? Are you building a box to keep God and life out? If you are, let me suggest you focus on building bridges instead. Bridges to your destiny inspire others to build bridges to theirs!

Why? It’s because inspiration is better than motivation on any day!!!

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So I leave you with this today. Your destiny is calling and it’s time to answer…to walk…to serve…to be.  Whatever your choice, idleness is NOT an option.

©2016 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Just Be You!

Your distinction is the key to your destiny!!!imagesWe live in a world where everyone seems to believe that their best attempts at success and wholeness is to mimic those they envy. But God only made one you. He really did break the mold when He made you and He knows the thoughts He has toward you…I-know-the-plans-I-have-for-you-says-the-LORDHe knew you before you knew you so why not consider His advice?

Of course it’s understandable for those who may not know Christ, but what’s our excuse as Christians?

Why are we so scared to break out of the societal norms to do what Our Heavenly Father placed inside of us to do?

Problems are always going to be around because God has charged us to be problem solvers!!! You’re unique for a reason! You’re called to solve the very problem that irks you. It’s time to get beyond, “I wish I could do something to change it” and actually do something to change it.download (1)You can’t convince me of what one person can’t do because I know what Jesus did in his humanity. Better yet, His death and resurrection gave us the power to do “greater works than these.”

So I plead with you to acknowledge that God has already given you access to wealth. A wealth of joy, peace, and yes financial abundance is at your disposal, but you can’t receive if you don’t ask!  You can’t see change if you’re not willing to do!  And get this, you have no right to complain if you refuse to take action. It’s time to do something more than the mundane…to be more than conquerors…to speak…to learn…to just do you!

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©2016 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Be the Real Thing

I think this deserves another look.

Better Not Bitter

When it comes to a dating relationship, the only games I like are spades and maybe Taboo.  And yes, even that gets old, but I’ve done my research and it amazes me of how many websites, books, columns, and questions are out there about the “hot and cold” dynamic.

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In case, you’re wondering what I’m talking about, I’ll define it”  At the start of a relationship…sparks ignite and things get hot (and not necessarily physical either)…when you meet, date, think you’re in love…you just can’t seem to get enough of each other…aka..usually the infatuation period…then all of a sudden…something changes…without warning…the calls aren’t as frequent, the text messages aren’t answered immediately if at all…now an argument would definitely be a good reason for this ghost action, but what if there is no argument or misunderstanding? That’s just it….cold =no warning.

Now, I’ll admit, it’s been a minute since I’ve been back…

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Slow down or Stall the Progress

It’s nothing like the flu to stop you in your tracks. Yes, not long ago what started out as a simple cold morphed into a sinus infection that mutated into the flu! I ‘ve been sick before, but not like this in a while. In fact, the last time I recall getting too sick to move. There was but one problem. I kept trying to do so. I was so determined to get to work that it seemed I was willing to kill myself in the process.

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I was still trying to help God out…not realizing that by allowing my sickness He was trying to do the same for me. He knew I needed to rest…needed to stop trying to handle it all…to do what I said I would…allow Him to take care of me.
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You see the submission of an independent woman is a rare find. And apparently I forgot that my independent attitude had freed me of nothing…it had all but imprisoned me in the cell of the wrong mindset.

That said, it seems I’ve taken off running without stopping to consider whether I really should have run at all. Sure God blessed the first direction and second, but then something happened where I began going it alone.I can feel it. I don’t like that feeling. And yep, it can happen that quick. Am I saying that God left my side? Of course not. I know He never will leave me. The problem is that I’ve taken off full speed ahead without checking the engines…I mean my heart…so with that I’m pumping my brakes and allowing God do a diagnostic before I even think about taking flight.

Just Flow

So in the last few months I’ve gotten three marriage proposals of sorts and I decided to consider it not odd. I’m a great catch. No, I’m not conceited, but from here on out I’ve decided to fully embrace all I have to offer…..completely be myself with no apologies, and live the life God’s given me to the fullest!!!! That said, despite those, there have been several other attempts to get me otherwise distracted from what needs to be done. PURPOSE!!!

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It seems that since I was 15 years old I’ve been in some type of “relationship.” It’s not that I’m warding off the idea of marriage or the thought of dating, it’s just that it is amazing how attractive you become when you decide that you’re just fine one way or another…

I mean whether I’m with someone or not….images (1)

I used to allow my mind to be consumed with the what ifs of dating…When my husband and I split several years ago, I toyed with the idea of dating, but even then I was not being honest with myself about what I really wanted or better yet what I needed. At the time, though I waited years to get back on the scene, I still didn’t even understand how to go about it….

I was used to settling…for so much less than who I deserved…I was used to arguing over dumb stuff…so I’ve decided that’s no longer allowed in my life…Some might think it strange that I would say that…Everybody argues right?

Wrong….you really don’t have to argue, but I can agree to disagree…just like I agree to disagree with all of you out there who believes that you must have a life with drama to sustain a relationship…

Lies and Deception….shakespearesmall

I know that laughter is indeed life’s antidote…people might disagree, but the joy I have is too valuable for me to allow drama and bitterness come in and take over…nope…not going anymore even a little bit.

People Prayer works…yes, I know this post is all over the place, but hey that’s just me and I really don’t care how you take that…really I don’t…all I can say is that it is incredibly freeing to be yourself, not be consumed with the opinions of others, and just be content…This probably should have been a post all by itself, but oh well…I’ve learned a few things that I don’t intend to forget…

I’m loved by My Father…I’m loved by Myself…And there’s quite a few others out there that love me too…I’m just so done with people pleasing to my detriment…I’m just so done wondering what this person and that person is thinking about me or what I’m doing…my time is valuable so to major on the minor is no longer an option…images

Amazing how the things we learn only are understood to be a resource later in life….I worked at a marriage ministry…picked up so much information on what to do and what not to do…and  here I am with a problem many ladies might wish they had….images (3)

Three possible suitors simultaneously vying for my attention, yet all I see is purpose.  Not that any of the guys are unappealing…In fact, all are pretty good options I guess…that is if I were interested…Hmmm…a lot to think about, but not so much…

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I’ve decided to be focused.  I’ve decided to remain ambitious.  I’ve decided to go against the grain and enjoy doing me because it’s the me who needs to be transparent…the me who desires other ladies to get to a balanced place in mind and heart like I’ve been granted….I’m not going back to where I’ve been…I’m not stuck up…just standards call for boundaries…Life has taught me that before I muddied the waters  too much.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do not regret any decision I have made so far…images (1)

I’m just realizing how a good thing may not always be a God thing…and even if that good thing is a God thing, if rushed, it can be ruined….how distance definitely can make a heart grow fonder…and if it was meant to be, it will be.  That said, when the time is right it’s right…images (1)

It’s just nice to know that one day all distractions aside, it will be worth the wait…that maturity is not actually measured by one’s  age…that life is a trip and sometimes you’ve got to be willing to just pack up and roll with it…

In case you’re wondering, I’ve decided to just flow!

©2016 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

 

When my hair isn’t done, I wear more make up

I heard for years that less is more. Yet, there are times when I can’t help but overdo stuff for no particular reason. I suppose I can’t really say there’s no reason. I mean considering the title of this post for instance…It was just an observation  I made while looking in the mirror one day last week. I suppose that passing thought could have happened today had something not changed.

So today I don my faithful ponytail and no mascara. Yes, I lined my eyes with this really cool iridescent blue just because I like it.  I can say it’s been a while since I’d done something  just because I wanted to…yes I know I shouldn’t end a sentence with a preposition fellow grammarians …that’s why I love ellipses so much…so there…

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When I made the comment it was just a passing thought… I thought I needed to add to one area of myself  to distract another I felt self conscious about…

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I guess that’s why so many girls plaster half naked pics on Instagram and Facebook…hoping that someone will notice…anyone  will notice…never realizing that by taking it all off they’re only trying to covering it all up…the hurt, the abuse, the low self-esteem, the feelings of worthlessness, the depression…all of which I’ve danced with…Until the other night I thought I could dismantle  my own strongholds …

Yet, I loathed that me…the me that thought such random foolishness as “When my hair isn’t done, I should wear more make-up.” I did because I knew it never was me, but in my own strength I was powerless against what I wanted to hear people say.

A shell…

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I wanted the compliments for my outward appearance so I could deny the things in me that needed to change.

Yet somewhere between midnight and morning of yesterday, I changed my mind…my heart…my attitude… I admitted the fears I’d had and I woke up free.  I can’t really explain the confidence I have right now…I just know I’m different.  I know I’ll never be in that place again.  I just know  who I am.

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©2016 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Just Ask

It’s simply baffling that this post did not come to mind before now…a time when I should be sound asleep so I can be at least partially present in church later…yet, if I must be honest, I know why it had not occurred to me before…for the same reason the obvious has escaped me time and time again…PRIDE. Yet, my pride lately has taken drastic measures to conceal itself since I began dying to myself sometime ago. While it would seem my plight grew easier…the manner in which I suffered that is…all along Pride had morphed into a cross between unworthiness and fear.  Who knew all along I packed these hidden cohorts with me on a daily basis…never fully grasping the reason God continually urged me to be strong and courageous. How much stronger could I become? I’ve lost everything, yet I still smile…even my beloved Guardian and Angel were taken and I left my tears with them at the shelter. How dare I be accused of having an ounce of pride left? So it decided to transform because it realized I had no use for it as it was…but pride must be more clever than it’s been…I’ve rested…I’m being revived…I’ve tasted fearlessness before and like a rabid dog has an insatiable desire for blood one he’s bitten, I too desire satisfaction. Desires of it this heart had been muffled because the pain seemed unbearable once. Yet wounds need exposure…then healing is inevitable…so it had not occurred to be to just ask My Father for myself…to ask Him to make me fruitful and that my words multiply…to make me wealthy inside and out…to make me shine like the sun in those times that seem so dark…to give me wisdom to say no and to be assured in my response…to allow me to completely and effortlessly fall in love with Jesus all over again with every breath…to remove the calluses from my heart…to transform my pain into praise…my tears into triumph…my isolation into inspiration…so Father in the name of Jesus, I just ask.

Don’t Drift

I drifted and of this came Just Be first…you’ll get that later I guess…

I’ve witnessed a lot of car accidents lately. Just yesterday at least four…one ended in a vehicle fire.  Until this moment, I didn’t understand why I’d nearly missed so many would be tragedies.  Albeit tragic for others, it seemed with every accident lately, it had been either a near miss or I had been delayed for some reason before it occurred. I’m grateful for that reason now.

I’ve heard that some driving instructors tell their students to never focus on the broken white lines because where you focus is where you drift…that you must continue to look straight ahead to reach your destination or run the risk of a crash or in the very least getting off course.

'What do you mean didn't I see it? How do you think I hit it?'

I woke up with this thought today. I drove with this thought today. I digested it and now my attempts to regurgitate it on paper baffle me. I’ve learned so much by and I sometimes retain so little of what I hear.

James 1:22  (AMP)

22 But prove yourselves doers of the word [actively and continually obeying God’s precepts], and not merely listeners [who hear the word but fail to internalize its meaning], deluding yourselves [by unsound reasoning contrary to the truth].

 

Yet, I’ve clearly heard Him tell me to slow down time and time again.  To focus.  To Relax. My mind refuses to allow it.  There’s so much to do…and aren’t I required to do it?

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I thought about how I knew better and encouraged others to do better.

Yet, I struggle with letting go of the mundane…I too often major in the minor…scattered are my thoughts and I long to get to the place where they weren’t so “all over the place.”

So I’ve been driving more slowly and paying closer attention.  Times I failed to see the approaching vehicle, something happened to keep me out of harms way.

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Some one asked me if I had ADHD a while ago. I know that I have indicated that diagnosis on more than one occasion, but I’ve never gotten an official word on it so that’s that. However, the fact that I drift from one topic to the next is interesting to say the least about myself. For instance, in the few minutes I’ve typed this post.  Two others have been birthed out of it and I simply had to cut and paste it elsewhere because I lose my train of this thought.

I digress. At least I’m aware that I do.

Perhaps I just have so much to say…to know…to do….perhaps that’s why I tend to only read books when I read 3 or more simultaneously.  I inevitably retain bits and pieces of each.

Focus…Get Centered…Get balanced.

I wonder now if balance even exists…I was advised there is no balance only harmony…that all the parts must work together…so who exactly decides how many parts are too many?  Perceptions of tone deafness in rhetoric are not equated to that of a well-orchestrated symphony.

 

And so I sit here and type.  

My throat is sore now and I type.

In silence.

I type realizing that I am coming down with something I never asked to receive. 

Yes, I did.  It would not be the first time that the Lord has used illness to slow me down. I accept it as what it is. I haven’t taken the time to meditate on His word because I’m too busy reading it.  I haven’t taken the time to do His word because I never really retain what I hear anymore.

Convicted, I’m not pleased to have a sore throat, chills, or fever.

Alas, I accept that I brought this on myself because of my overwhelming tendency to drift…off topic…in other lanes…doing everything I am asked to do without considering if I am well enough to take on one more thing.

I’m not, but I still say yes. Perhaps that in itself is my sickness. That I seek to please everyone too much at the expense of my own health…at the expense of God’s leading…

I’m glad God knows when I’ve had enough. So I will say no to myself today.  No more appointments and meetings.  No more television and reading three in one or more. Just rest.

I’ve drifted far too long.

©2016 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

Just Be

So today before I could get out of bed I cried out. I admitted with silent tears that “I don’t know what I’m doing…what I am to do…I don’t know the next step!

Deflated. I gathered what was left of myself and painted.  I painted my face to hide my frustration …of not knowing and not trusting as I had before.

I couldn’t allow my children to see that me…the one who couldn’t  get it together. I’m tired of starting over, but transition has been my perpetuality– I know it’s not Webster’s word…so it will at least be mine if only for a moment.  So little is mine now.

In the 7 months since leaving the familiar, I’ve lived in 4 different places.  The place I’d sought I thought I found before. It was the wrong thing. The wrong person. It was in myself at one point…in my fiance at another…in my employer, but not in God.

I admit I failed My Lord.

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Still He keeps me. Still He loves me. Still He comforts my soul with echoes of unconditional.

I am loved. I am His. He has never left me…never forsaken me…while I forsook Him by trying to do me…but I never actually got that right either.  You see because for a while I thought doing “me” meant doing religious activity…attending events…being where I was expected to be

Not so.  I only needed to but Be.

I wondered why again He’d chose me for such an insurmountable task…why He chose me to bring such a huge vision to so many…and again I was reminded to Just Be Loved. To just Let Go.  To Just Be Me.  

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I considered the thing.  To Just Be Me.  To Just Be Real. To Just Be.

I believe I will.

©2016 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

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