Better Not Bitter

Responding God's Way to Life's Challenges


April 2015

Newsflash: God Loves Homosexuals Too!!!

So this morning I’ve found myself more grateful for the gift of boldness I’ve been given. I suppose I have edited my comments on this subject too…by keeping quiet, but that would be too easy so here goes something.

Disclaimer:  By the way, from now on I’ve decided to not edit my posts until after the first run…I’m still a little nit picky, but this freeing “lack of activity” is helping me to actually let loose and reach my goals instead of writing and re-writing post after post without actually publishing them-For the Record, I have more drafts than posts-so yes, it’s A NECESSITY…anyway…grammarians beware…I know better, but out of the heart flows the issues of life so…


I love how God connects the dots of our lives.  So about the same-sex marriage issue, homosexuality, gay pride, and all the other terms that have been thrown around in the media yet eerily hushed in the church…I believe the issue at hand is a matter of ignorance and pain not hatred…indeed fear and anger…no bigotry…well at least not most of the cases I’ve observed.

Now granted there are some STUPID PEOPLE out there who have physically hurt and even killed those who identify themselves as a part of the LGBT community as their dumb attempt to so call “cleanse” our world of who they feel don’t belong….

Hmm sounds so familiar doesn’t it?  Oh yeah, that’s how that whole racism/slavery/civil rights uproar started huh?


There are some who argue that some people are born homosexual.  Until about three weeks ago, I would have disagreed.  I’ll explain in the next post in this inevitable series.

There are others who say that the lifestyle is a choice.  I was one of those people before. In the cases of the people I know who are openly “gay,” they admitted it was their choice…albeit involuntary…still a choice…I’ll explain that in an upcoming post too.

If you haven’t noticed a little trend here, there is A WHOLE LOT MORE TO SAY ABOUT THIS ISSUE …so the confines of one measly post wouldn’t do it justice so I rather than to go off on a million tangents in this one, I’ve deemed it necessary to expand this area….

That said, I do encourage your comments-good or bad because I know that God’s called me to be a voice in this area for some strange reason…I say “strange” because I’ve never been on the other side of the fence if you will…images (8)

However until I gather more information…testimonies…stories and news…

Well that’s it…I don’t really know the direction that God is going with this yearning, but I know that it will be all good in the end so I’m going with that.

Did I ask for this?

In a word:


Okay that was three, but you know what I mean#smirk

However, this has been on my heart for quite some time and within the last few weeks I’ve been bombarded with it whether I want to go there or not…

Feeling some kinda way right now…ms_jonah(1)

Well, I guess that’s not the best example considering that Jonah hated the people that he had been called to help.

That’s so not me…as much as I’d like to strangle a few folk every now and again for the silly things they do and say, I hate no one. Rather, since I was a child, my heart has bled for the broken…

God touched my heart a couple weeks ago when He whispered to me that He wanted me to minister to “another” type of broken people…

…Not just those women impacted by sexual abuse or domestic violence, not just those ladies who felt jilted by love, and not even just those children who found themselves involuntarily caught in the crossfire of chaos…but a broken that I never felt like I understood…a broken people that though I was ignorant of many of the struggles they may or may not face, have always had a special place in my heart and mind…

I admit…I have been disturbed by some of the things I’ve heard and seen, but I’m still sitting on the fence as to whose actions have had me more shocked as of late…images (19)

There are some Christians who are on the down low.

There are some Christians that are just low-down when it comes to the way they treat others regardless of sexual “orientation” or “preference.”

Regardless, everything I just mentioned is and always has been a moot point.

That said. I do believe that marriage is only marriage when the two involved are one man and one woman.

However, as a Christian there are some things that we must consider about God’s character:

 God is Love: 

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 New International Version (NIV)

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Since God is love, I submit that He LOVES everyone! And yes that includes HOMOSEXUALS!!!

Now I’m sure that I’ve probably gotten a bunch of snarls and gasps by that last comment.  Who knows? Perhaps I may even get un-friended or un-followed for typing that, but I really don’t care. After all Jesus was ostracized for spitting the the truth so I’m still in good company.

Anyway…back to the subject at hand…

While real love is unconditional, it is not often exemplified in a manner that allows one to have his or her own way.  Ask any attentive parent that question.

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We as Christians must learn to relax in the right way!  Now with all the stories coming out about this person and that person who just “came out” it seems that our world is too preoccupied by the commercials instead of focusing on the program at hand.

Perhaps we are so caught up at times in hating the sinner that we forget that we too have fallen short of God’s glory, albeit in other ways possibly, but still just as sinful as our homosexual counterparts.

Jesus didn’t come to condemn the world but to save it.  Did we forget that part, church?

No, that does not mean that it’s time to allow two men or two women to be married in our churches, but if a couple comes in arm and arm and your first thought is to snarl, consider not just what Jesus would do, but consider what He did do.  Not to mention what He still does, through His Holy Spirit for you today!!!

When He clothed Himself in our flesh, He was constantly verbally attacked by religious leaders until yest their rage incited physical attacks, and ultimately death because He  was considered to have consorted with those who were “Sinners.”  But He Did Rise Again!!!

Is anything too hard for God? No, but it seems that the simplest things like loving one another is so hard for us doesn’t it.

Are you the one who denies that family member access to your child because you fear the “influence”- Disclaimer-There are some folk that will molest kids so I understand protection, but there is a better way to explain things to them. I know full well that it was no coincidence that our broadcast aired this info right when God had placed it on my heart to pen this post…

I’m humbled and grieved…

Yet, I am thankful that there are authors and speakers out there like Sean McDowell teaching that better way…God’s way…the loving way to address this overwhelming shift in our culture.

For the Record>>>>>

We all are sinners…the only difference between your sin and that of a brother or sister in Christ who may struggle with same-sex attraction is that your sin is not displayed like a scarlet letter.

I have a question for you.  All things considered, if you know better…want to do better…try to do better, but every time you fail, it’s stamped on your forehead, would you at some point just give up trying?  I would. So perhaps that is what many of our sons, daughters, cousins, brothers, aunts, uncles, and even mothers and fathers have taken to heart.

Though the decision being discussed in the Supreme Court might strike an uneasy cord in our nation today, consider that the reason this is happening is because so many of God’s children have forgotten that a threefold cord is not easily broken.  Perhaps when we get together and include God’s real point of view in this matter as well as so many others, we too we be able to love as He so unconditionally does.

©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

My Prayer for Today and Everyday

….Just in Awe of My God’s Grace, Mercy, and Redemptive Power…REPOST

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You so much for…

answering my prayer…

helping me re-examine my life as a mother, sister, and daughter…

renewing my mind…

giving me hope in every area of my life…

Thank You for the journey and for Your provision…

God, You are mighty!

Thank You for strengthening me and allowing me to be willing to do what needs to be done as a mother…

Thank you for helping me realize that I have a choice in how I will react to my circumstances

Thank You for renewing my faith…

Thank you for cleansing my mind and my conscience…

Thank you for giving me accountability partners…

Your Divine hand is on my life and I am so grateful…

I realize where I’ve gone wrong in the past and I thank you for reminding me

that in spite of me, You love me.

In Jesus’s name I pray. Amen.

Quit Editing Yourself

So I titled this post as if I’m telling you all to just flow with the script God gave you, but really I’m talking about myself.

Yesterday I had a very soberly dose of reality.  I attended a writer’s conference that I almost didn’t because of a number of minor excuses.  But boy am I glad that I did go!  The information was not only specifically what I needed to hear from the experts who spoke about writing memoirs and techniques to use in non-fiction writing, but the new folk I sat next to were by far the best reason to attend.

One young lady and I immediately hit it off. The ice breaker was original unsettling because as we found out, we both were introverts so the fact that we were required to walk around the whole area arm and arm telling one another a story about the other as we made the trek.  We both agreed on at least three occasions during that little adventure, “This is so weird.”

Regardless of the weirdness of that situation, I am thankful for that meeting and the next.  The main speaker for the first portion just happened to have a lot more in common with me that I expected. I was immediately intrigued because she had been a professor in the writing center from UALR.  I felt the need to gain some further direction about the book I’d been working on for what seems forever!

After a few breaks and sharing a bit more of myself with the young lady to my left.  She asked whether I record myself and transcribe it. I admitted that I used to do that and sometimes I will find myself talking about my story and regretting that I never pressed record.  Even in that conversation, I wish I had not paused it.

Maybe subconsciously I felt I had nothing to say worth hearing again.

I’m glad that this young lady admitted as a disclaimer that she’s gotta work on tact before she shared with me exactly what I needed to hear.

As I shared bits and pieces about my mother and the trials I’d faced with my ex-husband and the ups and down f single motherhood, her words stung but they were just the hypodermic needle I needed to push me to accept the fact that indeed I did just need to quit editing myself.

“You need to just do it.  I think that you’re trying so hard not to be like your mother than you are going to send yourself to the opposite end of crazy!”

Pointing out that I did possess a few OCD tendencies when it came to editing my work and even reading the work of others, the meat of my issue was revealed in another very telling statement she made, ” I think you are so worried about what people will think that you are editing yourself.”

I knew that I’d always had the tendency to correct my grammatical errors as well as that of others for years and I knew that I have a tendency to procrastinate.  What I couldn’t get was why I could set a goal to finish grad school with a 4.0 when I started, maintain that 4.0 except for one B+ and an A- at the end of that trek, settling for a 3.875.  I was still proud that I’d been graced to receive that after having been out of school for so many years prior.

This other new acquaintance mentioned the reason I managed to get it together when I was in grad school was that I had forced structure- a plan that someone else had made for me, and that I hadn’t completed the book because of I lacked a rubric.

We were given an exercise to write on the fly and one other young lady’s feedback jolted my spirit.
“I wanted to hear more. I could identify with your desire to reconcile with your mother and whether it was even possible to do so because I too struggle with issues within my family.”

We were told to write for about ten minutes on the fly.  We were told to pick a person from a list of names that I’d jotted down earlier and just to write.  We were not told that we would have to read it aloud to someone else for feedback

I’m glad I didn’t know what.  Had I known that I would likely have done what I’ve done, I would have edited myself…my words…my story.

Well no more!!

I know that that has been my crutch and I’ve held onto a cast for too long.  I’ve been healed but I supposed I’d gotten used to the comfort.  So while I am still an editor at heart, I understand that writing from the heart doesn’t require that I go back and undo the wrongs that I have done, but that I just am in the moment.  With that, from this point on, I’m deciding to be perfectly okay with my grammatical mistakes on this blog.  I want real people to read and be blessed  and that by no means requires perfection so today I’m finally able to stop editing myself if for no other reason but to entice you to do the same

©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

What Happened to Officer Friendly?

As a child I was naive about a lot of things. Considering what I see and hear on the news lately, I wish I could say the same of myself now.

I remember a time when policemen would visit our schools to explain their duties as officers of the law: 


They weren’t posted in the school corridors to prevent kids from becoming the victims of murderous rampages. There was no need for armed guards to check the bags and other belongings of students.

Perhaps the only relevant evolution our society has seen is one of blood thirsty madness.  Yes.  The type of protection needed from police officers has indeed warped over the years.  More disturbing still, however,  is that our society now needs protection from those who used to provide it.

Before cops were not the one’s found guilty of sexually assaulting women and children or accused of racial profiling.

I never feared the police then. I never expected the cop to be the criminal despite the movies.

Fast forward 30 years and I’m really ashamed at the number of crimes committed openly by the “so-called” officers of the law.


It makes me wonder whether the naivety of my youth was the only thing that spared me from the realities of such corruption then.


With the technology explosion, there just is no way to explain away some things. Eye witness testimony is no longer a necessary evil to convict since everyone has a smartphone.  

Because of the ever-looming camera’s lens, actions really do speak louder than a person’s words.

I have no beef with the police department itself so my goal with this post is not to bash those officers who really do take their role in society seriously.  I still count those as heroes.  

Yet, I just have to get this out!  

I’m tired of hearing about people being brutally killed for no reason by an officer who chooses to abuse his or her authority regardless of the race or ethnicity!!!!

Years ago, the only news of stuff like that I recall was of the brutal beating of Rodney King.  Maybe a few years later, I’d heard a few stories here or there, but now it seems that every other week in the US, there is a different story involving police brutality with a tragic end.

I’m not damning cops!!!

Before I came of age, I used to believe police officers had the choice to use discretion with whether they were to shoot to kill if in eminent danger or whether they were taught to just wound a person in the process to retain proper control.


I’ve know now that if the threat is eminent, shoot to kill aka double-tap method is required.  Regardless, double-tap DOES NOT EQUATE TO EIGHT SHOTS IN THE BACK!!!!

Warning!!!The next link is disturbing:  I imagine at some point this will be taken offline as evidence to convict but for now here it is:

Murder of Walter Scott

I’ve never been in the police academy, but I used to work for the City of Memphis Credit Union so I came to know quite a few great police officers.  I never felt threatened by any of them and I prided myself for personally knowing so many. I felt safe in their presence.  I had no worries that I could ever be mistakenly accused of something and fatally shot or that the same could be the fate of one of my friends or family members.

Now I admit that I did definitely question the MPD after I was attacked nearly 12 years ago though.  I mean, I was the one in the back of the ambulance with the broken nose and the officer felt the need to almost arrest me for the domestic dispute.  All because my assailant cowered and told him that I attacked him.

Never mind that the only reason he really had scars or scrapes on his hand was from the glass table that broke when I went through it!!!


Go figure!  But in defense of that officer,  I read the irony on his face then. He didn’t want to ask me any questions.  In fact, he kind of said something about “policy.”  I don’t blame him for not using common sense because I know that while he almost resisted the questioning, he did what he had to do so I easily forgave him the moment he left the bus.

That said, I can’t help but feel sympathy for those police officers who are put in a position where they are forced “to do what they must do” in spite of what makes sense. Sadly those officers are mercilessly lumped into the same category in the public eye because there are those who’ve forgotten that sometimes to do what must be done is to do so much less.

©2015 Nadia Davis.  All Rights Reserved.

Rest for His BeLoved

The benefits of true rest are amazing!!!

Maybe I’m feeling a bit nostalgic because I’m that much closer to 40!  Oh Yeah…today is my birthday…by the way…happy-birthday-to-me-fb-timeline-t2

About this time last year, I realized the importance of resurrecting the relationships that matter, however, though I’ve reconnected with family and friends lately, the one person I’ve still neglected is myself.

I guess I never really took a good look at my relationship with myself until now.

As I peered in the mirror this morning, it’s hard to believe that a good night’s sleep was something of a distant memory not long ago. I’d been lying awake most nights since the passing of my mother. If I got three hours of sleep, it was a luxury.

Before, I assumed the issue could be remedied easily.  So I tried melatonin, lavender, ice cream, and yes people even Benadryl, but I still couldn’t seem to get it together.

Something changed the other night though.  

Maybe is was the music!  I love to sing and music has always moved me to another place altogether, but as I tuned in for a late night with India Arie I felt weightless.  Maybe it was when I decided to resurrect myself and become the type of person I expect to receive.  Perhaps it was just pure exhaustion that forced me to slow down for a moment of silence. But whatever it was, I know now that my rest has everything to do with my willingness to be loved.

I’m sure the spark that ignited a determination to destroy the source of my insomnia beyond eliminating caffeine and too much exercise was a simple message from a friend that made my day.

Hello sleepless beauty, are you okay?

While the message came from a person I consider special, knowing that my Father in heaven orchestrates the steps I take, I didn’t blush because of who was used to deliver it.  Years ago, I might have been so naive to do so, but this time I smiled because only God knew what I needed in that moment.  He’d been the only one that heard my prayer the night prior because my words were barely above a whisper…

No I wasn’t begging God to allow someone to “tell me I’m beautiful” or “give me a compliment.”  Rather, I simply asked God to remind me of how He sees me.  I asked that He allow me to be as beautiful on the outside as He had been transforming me on the inside.  I asked that He allow His light to shine through me.

It’s  not the first time the Lord sent a kind word my way so I know this was no exception. However, nestled in the response was still something more than I anticipated receiving.  The simplicity of “Are you okay?” wasn’t because the God of the universe didn’t know whether I was okay or not.

Instead, He wanted me to know that it was okay for me to rest because I was His beloved.

©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Resurrect Yourself

Good morning Ladies and Gents,

Happy Resurrection Day!!!!  Believe it or not I plan to keep this post short and sweet!  I just want a drop a friendly reminder in your spirit to Get Up!!!

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I’m so thankful that I can do just that because My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ did it for me over 2, 000 years ago. Some might say Happy Easter, but today it has but one name that fits in my book and if you’re a Christian, I suggest you consider it the same way.  I’m not wasting time bouncing on the bunny and eggs and other pagan stuff that’s been added to today’s significance like so many have done so that’s about all I’m saying about that… You do you is the best I can come up with at the moment.

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Anyway, whether you find your way to your relatives’ home for ham and a bunch of other goodies today, consider a few things further.   Jesus died and rose again so that satan and sin would have no dominion over us. Essentially, He took all of the sin we were born into to the grave with Him that fateful day and brought back our choice to have an abundant life.  That said, I want to encourage you to fully embrace that gift today and every day forward.


  • Don’t sit around and mope over what you shoulda, coulda, woulda done differently had this, that, and the other happened.
  • Don’t waste time blaming others for mistakes you’ve made.
  • Don’t blab on about your problems because trust me somebody somewhere has it so much worse than you think you do.


If nothing else take the time today to Get Up, dust yourself off, do something different, and move on!  You might even want to do something you’ve done before but haven’t allowed yourself to fully enjoy the moment again.

Now I’m not telling you to go have a drunken orgy or something silly like that…I’m saying, since we are set apart to be a peculiar people, act like it.

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If it is going to be a nice day where you live…get outside and enjoy it…take your kids to the park and you allow them to push you in the swing…you go and get on the slide today! If you don’t have kids, you be the kid!

Laugh for no reason at all…images (2)

Heck even if it’s pouring down raining where you live…go to the park anyway and play in the rain….Smile and the whole world really does smile with you…even if they are laughing at the silliness of your antics…don’t assume they are jealous or hating or just being mean….chop it us as Jesus did for all of us on the cross:

Forgive em because they don’t know what they’re doing….Better yet, forgive em because for the first time in perhaps a long, you do know what you are doing!

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You’re living the life of joy Christ died to give you.  So go ahead, get dressed, go to church, get with family, or be alone in the word…however you choose to celebrate the resurrection of our Savior…do it with the knowledge that He lives!!!

Don’t you think it’s about time that you to do the same?

©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Removed for Restoration

I remember a few years ago someone posted the following on Facebook,

“In life there are two certainties: You’ll never get everything you want and you’ll never want everything you get.”

Pretty Depressing Huh?  drowning

Of course I commented at the time and today I feel the need to elaborate.

In a nutshell then, I explained that when we view everything we receive and do not receive from a Kingdom perspective, we learn to appreciate those things we get and learn to also be grateful for not receiving the things we thought we wanted. Continue reading “Removed for Restoration”

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