I marveled this morning as the Lord doused my being with His Holiness….His insurmountable presence on the drive into work…yes I said to work…not a job, for the work we do is to honor God and to endure what we must to allow His light to shine regardless of what that task entails.
It seemed that everyone in my home this morning was in a sour mood, except me. I admit, most days in the past when things weren’t as clean as I’d expected or instructed the night before, I was the one who was a tyrant.
Yet, this morning and the one before, I woke up singing. I was moved to worship. I was taken back to my first love…I was reminded of what I used to do that had gotten me through some things others cringe to even think that I have endured. I sang…I smiled…I cleaned the messes that were left from the prior night without accusing anyone or speaking negatively about being unappreciated under my breath.
I suppose I not only saw myself as God sees me, but for the first time in a long while, I saw God above everything around me. As I exited my garage yesterday, Kayla was a bit antsy because she has some important tests to take. Despite her attitude, I recalled the prayer I said aloud to bless my day and my children especially.
I hadn’t done that in a while either.
That truth alone could have easily been a reason for me to feel bad for what I hadn’t done, but I couldn’t. I finally knew why I had no room to feel sorry for myself as I inched further down the road towards the expressway. I said it aloud too. I cannot recall it verbatim, but the gist of it was,
It’s impossible to get distracted by the bills and problems that compete for your attention when you worship God!!!
At the red light, my daughter responded a bit smug, but she’s approaching adolescence so I wasn’t phased by her demeanor,
“I don’t understand what you are saying, that’s something for you and Mrs. Tesa to discuss.”
At that moment, I said, ” You used to understand.”
Again, that could have led my mind to despair in the days, weeks, and years that had gone by that I hadn’t taken the time and prayed with, read the bible with, and taught her and my son the word of God, like I used to do. Yet, I couldn’t be distracted. Instead I heard myself saying, “but I planted the seed, and though I hadn’t nurtured it as before, I just need to get back to work.”
Then something dynamic happened again…I was filled with joy all over again as if I’d been given one of those big “grandma loves you hugs!” Except this hug was from my daddy….My heavenly Father…My God…My King!!!
I felt like whatever I’d done and hadn’t done didn’t matter…because it doesn’t…and it didn’t.
I just began singing again…I began singing, Here, I am to worship…Here I am to bow down, Here I am to say that You are God!” You’re altogether Holy, altogether Lovely, Altogether Wonderful to me…Tears of joy overwhelmed me as she sat in silence for the remainder of that drive.
Now it all makes sense!
I thank God for allowing me to consider His grace and allowing several verses in Ephesians arrest my attention this morning instead of all the other things that could have.
The fact that I “couldn’t” be distracted by those things simply meant that they were not significant enough to really matter in that moment. It made me wonder why I’d wasted so many other “moments” in my past worrying about them in the first place.
Regardless, it’s refreshing to know the power God’s given me to not only ignore the fruitless attempts of the enemy to run my life, but to also fully embrace the grace to choose to have joy in spite of them.
I admit, I’ve slacked in some areas. Yet, even that can’t separate me from My Heavenly Father’s loving grasp. And right about now…I’m just honored to do anything I can for God alone.
©2015 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.