Everybody knows break-ups suck…
…but there is hope for those who are willing to wait.
A few months ago a friend confided in me about her brief encounter with “the one” that fizzled. I responded to her privately the following words…I’ve changed a few of the dynamics to ensure anonymity as this is not some attempt to put my girl out there. In fact, I’m really putting myself out there instead, but if I have to put myself out to help another sister realize her worth, so be it.
So here it is…from my heart to yours…
Oh…girl…I’m so sorry…this is incredibly late…I know that God knows who you need and who you want…the thing is that satan only knows what he hears you say. Understand that satan is a deceiver. He presents us with what and who we think will fulfill the desires of our heart. In this case, I suppose this is what happened here. For me, honestly, I didn’t want to “date” and I actually tried my way to get in touch with the young man I’m with now about a year ago, shortly after my divorce was finalized, but it did not pan out. I never was able to contact him. When I was selling Mary Kay, my crazy butt went to my old job, ran into him and gave him a catalog with my “maiden name” assuming he would make the connection and call me though I handed it to him under the guise of, “get something for your mom and sisters” I know that’s pretty sad, but I’m telling you this—hadn’t shared that before—LOL to let you know how incredibly lonely I thought I was. Yet, God’s timing proved fruitful at a point when I was at my wit’s end, clearly almost a year and a half later. I don’t believe that God wants you to be alone but perhaps he does want you to “give up.” I mean…to give up looking…to give up “your standards” “your desires” and trade them for all He has for you instead. I can attest to the fact that what attracted me to my Joseph was his character first. Yet, when we first met about 7 or 8 years ago, it was his “peculiar” ways that repelled me. It repelled me because my heart was not ready. I was bitter and angry with life and especially men. Perhaps, you too are bitter about some things that have occurred in your life or perhaps there is some area of unforgiveness that needs to be addressed. And when I say unforgiveness, I don’t mean towards another person, but perhaps there’s something that you have held against yourself. I know God would not have allowed me to be in this relationship now had I not truly been able to forgive myself, my ex-husband, and even my mother for some of the things I’ve carried for years. Girl, just thank God for allowing you to get fair warning of what could have been a disaster early. I know that had I gotten with my guy earlier, I would have ruined it because I hadn’t yet grasped how much God loved me. I hadn’t realized that in my waiting all God wanted me to do was see myself the way He sees me. I encourage you to do the same. Trust me, you’re beautiful inside and out, God knows it and your Boaz does as well. Consider this, Boaz watched Ruth as she worked…so in all you do…do it as unto the Lord and He will direct your path. Never underestimate that your God-sent could already be right in front of your face, mine was, it just took me several years to take my blinders off. Be blessed.
Yes, ladies it may be hard to get beyond the rejection and loss that brews in our minds and hearts as we say goodbye to another potential “one,” but the good thing is that when we know who we are(Fearfully and wonderfully made) and who’s we are (the apple of God’s eye), in time we’re able to wipe the tears and rejoice in the reward that awaits.
©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.