Better Not Bitter

Responding God's Way to Life's Challenges


March 2014

Beware of a Toxic Influence

So you wear your halo well on most days…sure it might be crooked, but you feel like you’re at least growing in Christ somewhat.

Yet, every now and then when you’re around a certain person, your angelic glow fades and in record time, you’re back to “the old you.”

Well, if you to catch yourself, you should count yourself blessed because that’s the Holy Spirit leading you . Now whether you decide to detour is up to you.

Let’s say you acknowledge the uneasiness in your gut and yes, you realize that perhaps it’s not in your best interest to continue this relationship.

Now What?

Typically, human nature leads to excuses, but as you grow in Christ the gift of goodbye can become second nature.

  • “But I’ve known ’em all my life!”
  • “But I’ve only been saved a minute, myself!”
  • “But I can lead them to Christ!” >>>This one used to be my favorite!

Yeah…Right!!! The fact is that only God can change the heart of a person!  Even then, we all have a choice in the matter. The thing that you must realize is that if the Lord is nudging you to clip the contact, obedience is better than any sacrifice you could ever make no matter how long you’ve known them.

So ax the excuses!

Okay. Let’s say you decide to obey….Do you just move, change your number, and un-friend them on Facebook?


While the “easy-out” may seem appealing. In most cases, our circles of friends have circles and closing the gap can be quite daunting when things are cut cold turkey as such.  Not to mention, literally moving might be a bit extreme!

So here’s where you must completely rely on the Holy Spirit’s guidance.

Here’s some simple steps to help you through the process:


Prayer is our lifeline to God and when you earnestly seek Him, You will find Him. That doesn’t mean you do not have to confront the issue. Rather as you pray, He will strengthen your heart and mind to handle the transition.  He will give you the words to say if words are even necessary.


It’s been said that if you have no plan, you plan to fail. In that same vain, understand God’s plan is greater than anything you could concoct so if you must confront, prepare for backlash.  Recall Mathew 16:23.  Even Jesus received it from Peter when He explained the fulfillment of His purpose.  Of course, satan was the culprit behind Pete’s misguided comments, but you get the picture!


I know this may seem silly because how does one practice getting rid of folk? <INSERT LAUGH HERE> No seriously, people take notice of how you handle things long before you voice your conviction so if you’re not living the life, you could only mar your witness.

Pack up and move on

I know that it may be hard to let go of those folk who have seemingly “had your back” all your life in exchange for what may seem like utter isolation, but remember, ‘the Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?’ Proverbs 20:24   It’s not our job to try and figure out God’s next move, rather, to move on when He directs you to do so.  Besides the peace of a non-toxic existence is so much better.

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.


Set Your Heart to Do It!

I was so blessed this morning. Well, I suppose I’m blessed everyday, but today I was made keenly aware of it.

Ok, here’s the back drop.

The CD player in my car (yes, I still have one) hasn’t worked properly for about 2 years. Essentially, a CD was stuck. It wasn’t a big deal really so I just opted for my radio. Well, a couple days ago, my CD player started working again. I finally ejected the CD to discover it had been one of my pastor’s sermons.

Entitled, Open the Eyes of My Heart, it had been drawn from Luke 24 when two of Jesus’ followers were walking and talking about Him when He joined them for the trek.  Only, it wasn’t revealed to them that they had been walking with Jesus until after they felt compelled to beg Him to stay.

Basically, God allowed their eyes to be blinded to the obvious until their hearts were able to embrace it.

I now realize why God had allowed me to hear this message again today. Ironically, the date on the CD was July of 2012, about a month after I’d lost my job, a week after child support stopped, and well before I’d received confirmation whether my unemployment claim was approved.  Yes, I feel the need to be more transparent that usual.  Regardless, what some might think a dismal set of circumstances,  it was a time when my faith seemed stronger.

Literally, every financial resource at my disposal went dry in a matter of weeks. Yet, nothing could convince me that God had left my side.

Fast forward two years, I’m steadily working again and doing pretty well in my finances, but the passed few weeks I’ve been overcome by fear.  Silly as it sounds, I’ve always said that when I set my mind to do something, it gets done. No questions asked. Yet, it occurred to me that I’d set my mind to be a published author years ago…that I’d set my mind to attend a writer’s conference months ago… that I’d set my mind to be ready,  manuscripts in hand to submit only weeks ago… and still there was a problem.

Revisiting this message allowed me to see that I had never taken the time to set my heart to do what my mind knew to do.  The Lord reassured me today that He had been walking with me all along, yet I’d been so busy reminiscing over the great things He’d done that I hadn’t taken the time to realize the great things He is doing.

So my advice today is one that I admit has taken me two years to activate: Don’t just set your mind to do what you’ve been chosen to do.  Rather, set your heart to do it and keep it set!

©Nadia Davis 2014. All Rights Reserved.

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