Search

Better Not Bitter

Responding God's Way to Life's Challenges

Month

January 2014

Peace of Perspective

Today I started my day as I should everyday…In prayer…Yes, I pray often, but this morning I was made keenly aware that my prayer life had been suffering….the result…my life in general had followed suit.  I’d been pondering in my mind for a while, how did I do it before?  I mean, I’ve been a single parent for years and I’ve had my share of financial hurdles, but before it seemed I’d always managed to keep it together.

I’d cried far too many nights over the “what if’s” of yesterday and even of yesteryear.  This morning’s tears were of joy!  I’m thanking God for giving me the desires of my heart..and also for revealing that when I change my perspective of my past to match His that only then can I truly embrace His purpose for my future….

Let’s face it!  Whatever happened yesterday is irrevocable…..so why wallow in it as if you have some way to push a rewind button.  You can’t undo what’s been done, but you can choose to do something different the next time you’re faced with similar circumstances.

In short, there is peace in God’s perspective so instead of stressing out over what happened, digest it, allow it to pass, and move on!

I realize now how God has been polishing me for my purpose and I’m just grateful for the peace of His perspective.

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

My Reason

Abuse has no favorites. It doesn’t take sides and has but one agenda…to break…a heart…a hand…a spirit…God has no room for it in His kingdom. Yet, it steadily finds its way to His children….I’m glad to say that I am a child of God who has been delivered from this trick of the enemy.

Understanding now that there is no excuse for domestic abuse whether physical, mental, or emotional, I realize that all I endured, had very little to do with me and everything to do with countless victims who suffer in silence.

Live the life God intended for you…let go of those who are not in His will for your life…Believe that God is able to supply your every need…Be all that you can be for His Glory Alone….Smile in the rain….pray through the pain…bow and give God your burdens….lift your head…open your heart to let love in and let His light shine!

 

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Remember to forgive

I know, I know….If you read my last post you’re probably wondering why am I contradicting myself? Well, I’m not!  Please allow me to explain…

Though the title “Remember to Forgive” seems pretty self-explanatory, for a longtime, the phrase was foreign to me.  That is, I welcomed the receiving part of forgiveness, but steered clear of that other end. (At least I wasn’t going to be the one to fess up to a fault first)—-Yep, therein lies the problem.  

Perhaps it was pride, but I never really gave the “need” to forgive others a second thought.  Nah, it was just plain selfishness—  After all, I did mention I’d spent most of my life as a “vengeance connoisseur”so why would I think of others?

Today, the Lord directed my attention to Psalm 130:3-4: “Lord, if you kept a record of our sins, who, O Lord, could ever survive?  But you offer forgiveness, that we might learn to fear you.

The only faults I’d overlooked before were my own…

A lot of us still live that way, and though I’m no longer bound in this area, I realize how easily I could slip right back into that mindset.   Naturally, there are times when immediately offering forgiveness isn’t easy, but, soon a whisper in my heart urges me to “Remember.”

No, the voice is not reminding me to mull over the last time I’d been betrayed nor to regurgitate the  times I’d let “other things” go.  In fact, those are the things that are best left forgotten, but more importantly, the voice reminds me that I had been forgiven!

Yes, someone else thought of me and decided to give me another chance.  And not just my friends or family members, but I’d been forgiven by Almighty God!  Better yet, I’d been forgiven in advance!

So you see “remembering to forgive” has very little to do with what was done to you and everything to do with all God’s done for you! 

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Forget to Forgive

My challenge to you today is to make an effort to forget!   Yes, forget all the bad that someone may have done to you.  Forget about the pain….the lies….the tears….the betrayal….and perhaps most importantly….Forget about the embarrassment. 

Now have I always lived with this philosophy?

Of course not!

But thankfully,  by being a little more forgetful of others’ faults against me, my road to true forgiveness has gotten much straighter.

If we are really honest with ourselves, we’ve all been hurt by someone and held a grudge.  As a Christian the expectation is that I immediately forgive whoever’s done the wrong. Yet, as I recall, my reality was never colored so perfectly.  In fact, I held grudges as if my life depended on it! (Didn’t I realize how bound I was?)

Apparently Not!!!  In fact, I used to boast things like.  “Revenge is my middle name” and “Oh, I don’t get mad, I get even!”

But of course ,when I gave my life to Christ that mindset slowly began to change. I actually felt bad for wanting to get even!  It could not have been any plainer in the bible:

  • Romans 12:17-21:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[a] says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

    If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
     if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
    In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[b]

    21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

…AND THAT’S JUST ONE SCRIPTURE REFERENCE

Yet, even now, saved and full of the Holy Ghost, I must examine this reality:

A few scenarios come to mind:

  • Forgiveness is very easy for some people.

Those whose spiritual gift is MERCY, I imagine, have absolutely no problem getting hurt, dusting themselves off, and lending a hand to the one who pushed them down.

I mean those folks already have a supernatural advantage to “let it go.”  (If only it were that simple for us all)

  •  Forgiveness is non-negotiable for others who’ve lived by the WORD long enough to understand that the enemy uses those close to you to do the most damage, but only if you allow it.  These people have a much firmer grasp on the truly forgiving spirit that Christ wants us all to posses. 
  • Then there are those like me!  This journey hasn’t always been so easy.  In fact, I only recently realized that I hadn’t truly forgiven my ex-husband for all the drama I’d endured when we were married. 

I’m so much better now.  Thank God!  I did not get there overnight of course and I am still working on this process when it comes to fresh wounds.  I’m just sooooo beyond picking the scabs of old ones.

And how did I get there?

Well,  of course the grace of God, has played a major part, but I’ve also learned to forgive by forgetting!

Come on, we’ve all said it, “I’ll forgive ’em, but I won’t forget it!!!”

I have a question for you—-WHY NOT?

Yes, as crazy as saying, “Don’t tell me something to get my hopes up” sounds- —shout out to Pastor Kelly for the reminder—don’t we want to be lifted?

Likewise, wouldn’t it be easier just to forget that the one who did you wrong had ever had done the wrong.  Indeed, it would.

DISCLAIMER: THAT BY NO MEANS IS A LICENSE TO BECOME A DOOR MAT!!!!

My WAKE UP CALL

Well, back to my aha moment of FAUX-GIVE-NAHS , My ex and I had been divorced about 8 months ago following a 3 year separation and I had anyone asked me before that day whether I despised him, I would have quickly said something like, “I love him like Christ does, I just don’t love his ways.”   Perhaps what I really would have meant was “Sure I love him from a DISTANCE—meaning, don’t call me, talk to me, mention me, or come around EVER again!  

Now while I realize this is NOT the “Christian” thing to do, before, I’d lied to myself and everyone else who dared to ask my opinion on the matter.

I hadn’t heard from him in months and hadn’t missed his absence.  Actually, I rather appreciated the release.  Yet, the reason behind that was not as kosher as I would have liked.  I didn’t realize this of course until I got the CALL…Rather… should I say…the text ….It was a couple days after my birthday, ironically, on his when I saw it.

Apparently, my daughter wanted to wish HIM a happy birthday so she’d sent him a text from my phone–no biggie, right?

WRONG..rather it should not have been, but I’d had two phones prior.  I’d just changed this number and had not given it to him intentionally. So of course, I went a little beserk…I fussed at her for doing that because I DIDN’T WANT HIM TO HAVE MY NEW NUMBER!!!!

Of course after I realized how completely wrong I was to go there….I began to pray that portion of the “Model One”

Lord, forgive me as I forgive those who…what????? 

Yeah right….how could I say that or even THINK that in prayer…did I really want God to forgive me the way I’d “forgiven” him? Sure, I told my ex that I forgave him.  I told my kids that I forgave him.  I even told myself that I forgave him, but until that very moment, I hadn’t realized that I really hadn’t.

My daughter of course was the one who first brought light to my reaction…I believe her words were something like, “You’re supposed to be a Christian, what about forgiveness”

Yeah, people, I was schooled by a 10-year old.  She was right and I was wrong…so yes, I apologized to her for my actions…but it would take me about 4 more months before I could stomach the thought of admitting my error to him…yes…the him that I didn’t want calling me….

My Point? 

Despite how bad a person may have treated you, true forgiveness takes much more of us than time. We must humble ourselves and yes we are to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us as Jesus advised in Mathew 5:44.  Only a true relationship with Christ gives us the peace to forgive others, so these days I’m holding onto something blissfully different, my peace of mind.

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

CALL HIM- HE ANSWERS IMMEDIATELY

Yes, I’m here again…back to Matthew 14:22-35….I just can’t shake that word!

IMMEDIATELY!

Three times the word “immediately” was mentioned referring to Jesus’ actions…how He immediately gave the disciples a directive…how He immediately reassured them when He first appeared on the lake…and how He immediately reached out His hand and caught Peter when he called Him.

I’ve re-read this passage several times and just before I was ready to post this message, I got yet another revelation…so naturally, I’ll be staying with this vein tomorrow too.

Get this…verses 32 and 33 has me excited tonight.

And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him saying”Truly you are the Son of God.”

Peter was a fisherman so what could have been more familiar to him than a boat carrying his family…brother-Andrew…and a bunch of his closest friends…No doubt, they all thought he’d lost it because they too were enduring the same storm…but when Peter sought an uncommon opportunity to get closer to Jesus, he took it…Not knowing whether he’d sink or stand…but he took a few steps out despite the raging storm.

And yes, he sank when he lost focus, but the awesome thing is that when he felt the water rising around his ankles and then his legs, he knew to call on the Lord to catch him before he went under. And of course, Jesus, immediately caught him.

The beauty that I had not grasped before is the possibility that Peter had indeed not been the only one that stepped out of the boat, but quite possibly could have led the way…
His example…I mean…we know that this account has led the way in our own faith, but the bible never specifically states how long Peter walked nor does it mention that he was the sole person to walk.  It merely indicates he was the first to step out.

Now I’m not adding anything to the word here so don’t fret.

I just know that in the moments that I’d re-read that scripture that the Holy spirit led me to realize that when we step out in faith, those who are behind us will have courage to do the same.

When we call on the Lord as our first response to trouble instead of a last resort, we, just as Peter had, show our family, friends, and even the enemy (don’t forget that Judas was on the boat too) the power that God has to keep our head above water.

So the next time you feel like you’re drowning, recall this passage and remember God specializes and making the impossible already done!

©2014 Nadia Davis. All Rights Reserved.

Step Out and Find Out-A Rich Year Awaits

Happy Rich Year!

I am full of faith! Yet,  I hadn’t considered it as my “rich year” until my brother sent a reminder in response to my traditional, “Happy New Year” text. His suggestion,”speak it and it will happen.” Of course, at 2 am, it didn’t really register as anything more than a “name it and claim it” cliche. After a few hours of sleep, thankfully, his advice registered.

I thought about all I’d sought to achieve and how God had given me the green light to pursue my dreams years ago. Only, I delayed the process.

Long story short…I’ve been working on several books for what seems like several years and well, things have been prolonged unnecessarily.

So why aren’t my books on the shelves yet?

I’d be lying if I said money was the culprit. I’ve already got the contract with the publishing company signed and sealed….

Only, I haven’t exactly delivered! (Literally, that is…I still have the originals)

Could FEAR be my bully?

It would seem so…

I could rattle off a long list of why I should be fearful:

  • Like the sea of competition
  • The complete lack of privacy
  • My past

YET, while plausible, those excuses just don’t cut it….My problem hasn’t been fear….

As I reflected this morning, I’d realized my procrastination had led to a gradual descent.

Peter, shared the same claim, I suppose.

No doubt you’ve heard of Peter walking on water. If not, check out Mathew 14:22-31….great read….

Well, I’ve run into this passage a lot lately.  In fact, just a few weeks ago, my pastor revisited it in his sermon.  He emphasized how Peter didn’t immediately sink either.

I re-read the passage today and I realized my problem had nothing to do with fear and everything to do with faith!

The thought of that revelation makes me cringe a bit even now considering all God has done for me.

But didn’t I have some faith?

Hadn’t I stepped out and contacted the publishing company with my proposal? When they agreed to accept it, hadn’t I paid them for their services?

Of course, so where’s the problem?

Considering I’d done all of that over two years ago, I think I’ve found it. I started with great faith, but I didn’t maintain it.  Instead, I allowed the storm distract me from my purpose.

Yes, like Peter, I’d stepped out of the boat, took a look around, got distracted, and stopped walking .

I know that God is faithful and I am fully aware that any talent I possess is only by His grace, so this year, while resolutions to lose weight or quit smoking litter social media, I’ve resolved to just keep walking.

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: